Ava's Bucket List

Ava shared her bucket list with us today.

I am inspired.  Here’s what I notice:

She is intentional.

She takes the time to write it down and posts it on the wall in the kitchen where she can be reminded every day.  

She is committed.

It doesn’t take her long to complete (15 minutes or so).  Once her pen hits the paper, she goes for it.

She is clear.

As I watch her write, she makes each addition with confidence and clarity.

She is specific.

The details are calculated and measured.

She is fearless.

From acquiring 1,000 stickers to becoming the Easter bunny, she sets no limits.

And then she wants to see mine. My bucket list includes a few messy notes here and there; I had nothing to show her.  I have work to do.    

As a parent, it’s easy to spend more time telling than listening.  In this moment, I was listening, I was learning.  As Ava shared her bucket list with me, I felt something happen between us.  I had a glance at what is important to her right now. I felt more connected to her. I understand more clearly where she is and where she wants to go.  I realize I don’t engage in this way with her often enough.   

Big and small, everything is invited to make the list.  A bucket list provides clarity, motivation and focus.  It allows us to participate with intention through activities and challenges in life we desire and choose.

Choose.

Choosing means new commitments; choosing means things can change.

Choose:

To decide that a particular person or thing is the one that you want

To make a choice about what to do

To select freely and after consideration; decide; to see fit

To accept and embrace

I’ve been turning the word (choose) over and over in my head for a while now.  I need it to be active, in the present.  I’ve been more intentional and thoughtful with choosing my one little word, my north star, my guide for living this year.  This has been such a great exercise because drilling things down to one word is a momentous challenge for me.

As I bring the word choose to life, I’m noticing where it shows up both in the big and little places. I’ve been carefully working my way (rereading, over and over) through the book The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson.  I’m learning about the power of small choices.  I tend to live focused more on the big decisions in life, often overlooking the strength and impact small choices have on the bigger picture.

After thinking about what it means to choose, I also realize this is saying “no” more often (even to the fun stuff).  When life gets too busy I get resentful; unaccountable to the choice I have in changing the pace.  I am beginning to really believe that it doesn’t have to be this way.

What it means for me to choose this year:

Choose progress over perfection.  For me, this is being content with the unknown; not everything can be anticipated or needs an explanation.  It is learning to listen for what I need and know my capacity.

Choose quality over quantity.  Set the pace.   Create more white space (more idle-time).  Begin with self-care.

Choose the adventure.  Trust what feels good and go with it. 

Choose to worry (care) less. At first, I was reluctant to claim I wanted to care less this year.  But then I realized this is exactly what I want.  Not in an apathetic--throw my hands up kind of way—but instead a conscious selective choice to worry less at work and at home.  I want to hang on to perspective and let go of what I can’t change; reserve the worry for when I need it.  Sometimes when we reject one thing, it means we are more available to accept another. 

Choose joy. In what we read, watch, hear and say (to ourselves and others), and with whom we spend our time--these are the places where we give and take from the world.  The space where perceptions are shaped and opinions are formed.  We then share these perspectives with those we love.  These are often subtle, small choices we are making every day.  What I want for them, I want for me first.

Life is a crazy balance of holding on and letting go, regardless of the season in life. I believe we have more choice in how it all turns out than we allow. We can do anything but not everything all at once.  We have the ability to redirect, change the path, and improve the quality of our experience along the way.  We choose.

The purpose behind our choices must be defined by choosing the best things of the season of life we are in right now. (Author Unknown)

If you chose a word this year, what would it be?